My Life In Darkness, part 33 (fiction)



previous episode


My Life In Darkness


33. Learning Magic


“Burn!” I commanded.

I looked at the scrunched up ball of paper in my hand. Nothing happened. So far this afternoon I had spectacularly failed to set anything alight.

“So what happened last time you set something on fire? How were you feeling?” Lisette asked curiously. I looked at her.

“I was feeling a mixture of scared and angry.” I replied. She smiled.

“Would it be safe to say that your powers have only manifested when you felt you were in danger or highly emotional?”

“Yes.” I agreed.

We were both sitting  in the garden at Astrid’s place. It was sunny but not that warm. Lisette was a witch that Astrid had asked to come round to help me with my powers. She had long black hair and pale skin. She was only slightly older than myself. She wore a long red dress with black and purple striped leggings.and black shoes with a long heel. At the moment she looked deep in thought.

“Have you been fed on recently?” She finally asked.

“Not for a few days.” I replied. “Can that affect my powers?”

“Well blood is life. I imagine if you’re fed on regularly it will affect your ability to access your powers. It’s a way sorcerers were kept weak in the past, by constantly draining them. Maybe Astrid is deliberately doing that to you.” She speculated.

I hadn’t thought about that. I thought it was more my lack of focus. I kept on thinking about my meeting with Maximilian yesterday. I still had no idea what to do about it. Do I say yes to him? Do I tell Astrid about him? I was unsure how to proceed.

“I’m not sure if she is doing that on purpose.” I finally responded wanting to give Astrid the benefit of the doubt.

“Hmm… Maybe if you try to remember the emotional state you were in. If you could try to make yourself feel those emotions again, it might help you gain access to your abilities.” She suggested.

I stared at the paper again and concentrated. I tried to remember how I was feeling that night when I turned Cass to fire and ash.

“Burn!” I commanded again to the piece of paper sitting on my palm.

Nothing happened. I sighed heavily.

“It’s just not working. Maybe you should have a go.” I tossed the ball of paper to her.

“I can’t cause paper to go up in flames just like that. It’s not how my powers work.” She told me.

“It doesn’t seem I can either.” I retorted.

“I just don’t think you’re focused enough.” She responded. “I think there’s something else your mind is occupied with.”

Her remark was a little too insightful. She could obviously sense I was grappling with something else.

“How are your powers different from mine?” I asked, changing the subject.

“Witches get their powers from specific times such as phases of the Moon, or incantations and rituals. Sorcerers, on the other hand, channel power sources around them into raw magical energy. It’s why historically a lot of mages never liked sorcerers that much, as it was just too easy for them to power their spells.” Lisette informed me. “It’s also known as jealousy.” She winked at me.

“But why am I a sorceress?” I asked her.

“I’m not a great expert, but I think it’s to do with bloodlines. You may have ancestors who were sorcerers. Those bloodlines can remain dormant for some time and then unexpectedly throw up someone like you. Though you are the first one seen in a long time. It was thought true sorcerers were gone from this world… You also might have some fey blood in you.”

“Fey blood?”

“As in elves or other folk like that.” She told me.

“They exist?” I asked surprised.

“Yes, but there are very few in this world, though there are some portals to Faerie nearby, I do believe.”

My head was spinning. There was more to this world than I had ever guessed. How had I ever not noticed any of this?

“If I’m a powerful sorceress, how come Astrid can command me to do things against my will?” I asked her.

“Because you’re bound to her it makes it easier for her to control you. It also helps if she has your blood in her, or you have her blood in you.”

“She feeds me her blood quite regularly.” I admitted.

“That will be part of the reason then. You are a person of power though, so you can learn how to resist her commands.” She revealed.

“How do I do that?” I asked intrigued.

“If she ever commands you, just become focused on yourself. Be aware that you are separate from her and are free from her influence. Try to imagine there is a barrier around you that Astrid cannot penetrate and that all your actions and decisions are your own. It may take a few attempts, but it could work. Let me know if it doesn’t, and we’ll try some other way.”

“Thanks.” I replied in wonder. She smiled at me.

“Us magical folk need to stick together.” She stated. “I better go. Just try to keep practicing your powers. Eventually something should happen.” She stood up.

“I will.” I told her, though I felt little hope something would happen at this point. Maybe I had burnt myself out destroying Cass?

We hugged and then she left. For the moment Astrid was still away. I suspected she was searching for my abductors. I remained in the garden trying to make the ball of paper ignite to no effect. I began to doubt I really was a sorceress. About an hour or so later Astrid finally returned. She found me in the garden still trying to ignite the paper in front of me. I was getting frustrated.

“Any luck?” She asked.

“No, but Lisette gave me some good ideas.” I replied.

“Well keep trying, but maybe you’ve had enough for today. It is starting to get cold and you should really come inside.” She advised.

I nodded. I felt I needed a break. I went up to the bedroom and put the ball of paper beside the bed.

“I’ll turn you to ashes yet!” I said to it. I then went downstairs to join Astrid. I found her in the kitchen warming up some blood. “Any luck in finding my abductors?” Astrid grimaced.

“I’ve found out who they were, but they’ve fled the country. Apparently they found out what happened to Cass. But don’t worry, eventually I will get them, even if it takes years. I’m a vampire, and time is on my side.” She replied with a confident manner.

“At least they will think twice before abducting me again.” I added. Astrid suddenly grabbed me and kissed me on the forehead.

“Don’t worry I won’t let them ever do that to you again.” She said holding onto me.

After dinner, a thought suddenly struck me when I was reading in the lounge. I looked for Astrid and found her in her study. She was seated at the desk and looked like she was writing a letter.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Dealing with some correspondence.” She replied still writing.

“Can’t you just send an email? Do you have to be so old school all the time?” I asked her.

“I prefer writing letters.” She answered. “Is there any reason you’ve come looking for me? Or are you needing some company?”

“I have to tell you something.” I admitted. She stopped writing and turned to face me.

“What?” She asked looking interested.

“Yesterday a man came into the shop. He said his name was Maximilian.” I told her. At the mention of his name Astrid’s eyebrows shot up.

‘The hunter?” She asked.

“Yes I had to have lunch with him, otherwise he threatened he was going to talk about it all in front of my boss.”

“Sounds like something he would do. What does he want with you?” Astrid asked concerned.

“He’s trying to get me to help destroy you.” I stated. Astrid shook her head.

“That horrible bigoted man has been trailing me for years. So what did you say?”

“I said I would think about it.” I told her.  She frowned at me.  “But I’ve been thinking, what if I pretend to help him so you can finally get rid of him?”

“You mean you tell him you will help destroy me, and then double-cross him?” She clarified. “I think I’ve been a bad influence on you.” She was looking at me impressed.

“Maybe.” I laughed. “I did not like him at all and I certainly don’t want him to harm you. I thought this would get him out of our hair.” Astrid slowly nodded her head at my words.

“Yes it could work. When do you see him again?” She asked.

“Tomorrow.” I replied.

“Okay go and talk to him and find out what he has planned, and then let me know.” She said standing up smiling. “Just be careful when dealing with him.”

“I will.” She came over to me and gave me a hug. We kissed.

“I could really fuck you now.” She said. I laughed again.

“Go ahead.”

With that she picked me up and carried me to the bedroom. She dropped me on the bed and then ripped all my clothes off. Within moments her face was between my thighs as her cold tongue licked me out. We spent the next few hours bringing each other to orgasm until we both finally lay there exhausted. Afterwards we cuddled and I fell asleep. When I awoke sometime later, Astrid was gone. I thought about what I had said to her.

If you play this right, you could get rid of both of them, a thought in my head said. I smiled to myself.

I grabbed the ball of paper by the bed.

“Burn!” I commanded.

The paper suddenly caught alight. As I concentrated on it, it burned more intensely until there were just black ashes in the palm of my hand. I blew them away and then went back to sleep.



Next episode: The Plan



Thanks to Charli Mills for the coffee ❤



Please donate! 🙂



©2019 Joanne Fisher




6 thoughts on “My Life In Darkness, part 33 (fiction)

  1. I’m currently hoping she’ll pull through, but I’m not holding my breath until it happens!


    Is Ashalla and (forgetting name) perhaps an ancestor of hers? It’s fantasy, can’t rule out lesbians having kids!

    Also also:

    I liked the witch.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s