Dumb Vampires 5 (fiction)



Dumb Vampires




Britney awoke. It was dark and she had no idea where she was. She couldn’t remember what had occurred last night. Though this wasn’t the first time this had happened. In fact waking up in a strange bed with no memory of the night before wasn’t too unusual for her…

“Hello?” she called out. The door opened and in came Sarah holding a jug. “What happened? Why am I here?” Sarah stood before her looking uncertain.

“I’ve got some good news, and some bad news.” Sarah stated.

“Bad news?” Britney repeated.

“Yeah. You’re dead.” Sarah said bluntly.

“I’m what?”

“You’re dead. Last night Freya killed you. Guess what the good news is?” Sarah said beginning to shake with suppressed excitement.

“Hello? How can I be dead if I’m talking to you? Duh!” Britney said wondering if this was some sort of stupid game Sarah was playing. “Is this a joke?”

“That’s just it. You’re a vampire now!” Sarah informed her excitedly.

A vampire?” Britney raised her eyebrows at her.

“Yeah Freya was just going to kill you and feed on you last night, but I got her to turn you instead. We’re like blood sisters now!”

“Blood sisters? Are you serious?” Britney replied screwing up her nose. Sarah held out the jug to her.

“Do you want some of Dave? There’s still some left.”

“Dave?” Britney reluctantly took the jug. It seemed to be full of warm blood. “Ew gross!” Just after she said that, the smell hit her and suddenly she felt ravenous. The next thing she knew she was drinking down the blood. She found it was just what she wanted to sate her growing hunger. “I didn’t think Dave would taste so good. Is there anymore?” She asked not quite believing she had just downed an entire jug of blood.

“No, that was the last of him. But don’t worry I’m getting Terri to come over shortly.” Sarah assured her.

“That bitch. I hate her.” Britney confessed.

“I do too, but at least she is full of more blood.”

“Yeah finally she will have some good taste!” Britney said. They both giggled.

“The only way she could have any taste!’ Sarah added. They giggled again.

“So what does being a vampire mean?”

“It means we won’t grow old and we can drink as much blood as we want and we will never get fat.” Sarah informed her.

“Wait, what?! Why couldn’t this have happened before now?”

“I know right!” Sarah agreed. “Best. Thing. Ever!”

“Any downsides?” Britney asked.

“We can’t go out into the sun anymore.” Sarah informed her. Britney just shrugged her shoulders.

“It’s not like I ever went out into the sun anyway. I partied all night and slept all day, mostly.”

“I know. Same.”

“And so you got Freya to turn me? Awesome!”  Britney held out her hand and Sarah gave her a hi-five. “Yay blood sisters!”

“Hey we’ve got fangs now! We could be fang sisters!” Sarah suggested.

“Awesome!” They hi-fived again. There was a knock on the front door below.

“That will be dinner!” Sarah said. She quickly left the room.

In the far corner of the room sat Freya quietly watching the other two in growing horror. What had she done?


To be continued…


Joanne Fisher



Index of earlier chapters: Dumb Vampires



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©2020 Joanne Fisher



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