You Can’t Stop Eating Junk Snax!
“Hey love?” Rachel asked as Natalie grabbed another handful of Junk Snax.
“What?”
“Since the lockdown began, all you do is watch constant news coverage while eating countless bags of snack food.”
“But I like Junk Snax. I can’t stop eating them!” Natalie replied.
“Okay, but your sweatpants and loose fitting top are the only clothes that still fit you.”
“It’s my way of coping. You still love me don’t you?”
“Sure, but could you at least take a shower?”
*
Above the Earth aliens looked down. The human race was fattening up nicely. Soon it would be harvesting time!
Joanne Fisher
This was written with the prompt to write a story about snacking provided by the Carrot Ranch September 24 Flash Fiction Challenge.
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Β©οΈ2020 Joanne Fisher
I’m definitely top of the list for harvest π π€
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During the lockdown all I did was eat and rarely venture outside… I think they’re coming for me too.
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I find myself, during this stay-at-home phase, only washing my hair when what is living in it starts burrowing into my scalp…
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Oh wow. That last line!
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Aliens wouldn’t want to eat us, LOL. Particularly not if you consider the belief many societies have that you take on the traits of the animals you eat (which is why eating predators isn’t kosher or hallal actually).
LOVE the story though. π
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Have you read a book (probably published in 1960s) called Come Hunt the Earth-Man by Phillip High?
Has certain resemblances. And you know it made an impression on me for me to remember the title and writer all these years on. Same author wrote Butterfly Planet, which was a sequel. Dated no doubt, but if you can find copies, you might enjoy them
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Thanks for that. I’ll look those books up π
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π
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Ha, ha! It does feel like current events are fattening us up for something we are not paying attention to.
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This explains so much. And is somehow better than other explanations…
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Lololol – but we’re all diseased at this point! Good luck, aliens!
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