I loved her more than she ever knew. She meant everything to me, but one day she stopped talking and then she was gone. I gave in to despair and darkness, then one night I found myself in a warm bath armed with a sharp knife working away on my wrists till the bathwater turned red. How I survived that night I have no idea, sometimes I wonder if I did.
I know a part of me still hoped that things could get better; that the only way to survive all this was to carry on and eventually heal.
you say I'm evil, but
what else could I be?
you callously tore me out
of your life and made me the villain
no longer talking, but
blaming me for the silence
choosing another to love
but expecting me to still be there
spreading lies to everyone
and not caring I would hear
you think I hated you or was angry
but in truth I loved you too much
I was always so naked around you
as though you could see through my skin
and see how rotten my heart was
all I hope for is that one day
you feel the same pain I did -
I want you to hurt
like you hurt me
maybe I am evil, but you
are not blameless in this
everything I have done is
because of your treachery
you should know to never
anger a sorceress
I killed and dismembered
my own brother
as a diversion
so we could escape Colchis
don't think I wouldn't
do the same to you
This poem originally published on this blog in January 2019.
I’ve always been intrigued by the figure of Medea in Greek myth. Most accounts tend to show her doing terrible things, but women in Ancient Greece never tended to fare well, especially in mythological stories. You could say that she is an archetype of the creative/destructive and of female revolt.
Meela gazed into the clouds. Today she had led a lightning raid into the Empire’s capital to destroy their fleet of sky-ships. The raid was successful and the Empire’s fleet was now just burning wreckage, but of all the ships Meela had led into battle only her ship, the Crimson Vengeance, had survived. Many of her friends had died today, and sometimes the price of victory was too heavy to pay…
I’ve been a bit quiet of late. I hurt my back quite badly and at the same time I’ve been going through financial problems. It’s a bit hard to concentrate on writing when you’re in pain and also feeling quite hungry, but I’m sure things will soon get better…
My poem Into the Unknown has been published in Catalyst 18. Thanks to the editor Doc Drumheller.
Into the Unknowni.m. Gertrude Fisher
over our totara
the tall forest
as you finally
For those of you unfamiliar with some of the words:
Ruru (also known as a morepork) is a native owl.
Totara is a native tree to New Zealand. In this poem I’ve used it to symbolise the family (whanau).
I headed to Anna’s place, as she had invited me over for dinner. We had only been dating for a short time, but already I had fallen deeply in love with her.
“Come in love.” She said when I arrived. We went to her living room.
“You hear they’ve found another victim of the Faceless Killer?” I asked her. They were called the Faceless Killer since they peeled off the faces of all their victims and took them as a trophy. Anna went over to her drinks cabinet.
“No I hadn’t. What do you want? I was going to have a whiskey.” She asked.
“I’ll have a whiskey too thanks. Anyway it’s the twelfth victim now. I wonder what they do with all the faces they take? The police still have no idea of the identity of the killer.” Anna began to pour the drinks. “You were out last night. It was fortunate you didn’t end up being the killer’s next victim.”
“I was on the other side of the city from where it happened.” She replied.
“But I thought you hadn’t heard about it?”
“I must have forgotten I had. ” Anna told me.
“Anyway no one knows where it happened. The killer murders their victims elsewhere and then moves the bodies to where they’ll be found.” I replied. Anna shook her head.
“Maybe I’m just confused about it.” She laughed. She came over with two glasses. I took the nearest one and we clinked the glasses together. “It’s great to have you over.” I gulped down the whiskey in one go. It had a bitter aftertaste. I screwed up my nose.
“I’m not sure I like that whiskey.” I said. She laughed.
“Can I show you something?” She asked as she took my hand.
“Sure.” I replied. She led me to her basement. We went down the stairs and I was instantly hit with the smell of bleach and other chemicals. Her basement was full of benches and what looked to be medical equipment. “What do you do in here?
“I do taxidermy. It’s sort of a hobby.” She answered. She led me through a door and we came into what looked to be an underground study. On the opposite wall were eleven faces with holes where the eyes were. She selected one and put it over her face. “I turn them into masks. I haven’t finished the latest one yet.” I was stunned. I could not believe what I was seeing.
“You’re insane!” I told her. She took the mask off and put it back on the wall.
“Maybe.” She said shrugging her shoulders.
“I’m going to call the police.” I said. She turned round and looked at me.
“Oh are you my sweet?” She said beginning to advance on me.
“I am.” I replied defiantly. My vision was starting to get blurry. As I backed away I stumbled. She laughed.
“I think the poison I put in your drink is starting to kick in. You won’t be calling anyone, my dear.” I fell to the floor finding it difficult to move, or even breathe. Anna stood over me. She then kneeled. “You’re so pretty.” She said as she lightly stroked my skin. “It’ll be nice to see a familiar face every time I look up at my wall from now on.”
I think you have to be a little twisted to write stuff like this…
I’ve spent most of the day in bed due to my back. In fact I wrote this story in bed on my phone. Today is the day I usually go supermarket shopping, but I was unable to. On Facebook I appealed to friends and family to pick some things up for me that I needed, and what do you think the response was? Silence. Absolute silence…
“Hello. I’d like to make a claim on my insurance policy for my house.”
“Yes, my house. It’s been destroyed.”
“How was it destroyed? Was it by fire or an earthquake?”
“No, a giant lizard walked out of the sea and destroyed it.”
“A giant lizard?”
“Yes it came out of the sea and began smashing everything up.”
“I see. So it smashed up your house?”
“Not quite, it stood on it.”
“Where you doing anything that might attract a giant lizard to attack your house?”
“Don’t think so. I just think my house was in the way.”
“Maybe you should have bought a house that was more inland.”
“Okay. When I bought the house, I didn’t think giant lizard attacks were something I would have to worry about. In fact, it never even entered by head as a serious possibility.”
“Well you need to be prepared for any eventuality.”
“So my lack of foresight in seeing that a giant lizard might one day stomp on my house is the problem here?”
“In a nutshell, yes.”
“I guess I’ll have to bear that in mind then.”
“I think so.”
“So am I covered for this?”
“Well reading your policy there is a provision for Acts of God, but a giant lizard isn’t really an Act of God is it?”
“I thought Act of God refers to any event that occurs outside of human control that can’t be predicted or prevented. I’m pretty sure a giant lizard walking out of the sea and stomping on my house is a perfect of example of this.”
“You might think so.”
“So you’re not accepting my claim?”
“I’m sorry this situation just isn’t covered.”
“So do I need to stipulate in my insurance policy that it should need to cover the possibility of a giant lizard destroying my house from now on?”
“Well yes, but we don’t cover anything like that.”
“So what do I do then?”
“Is any part of the house still able to be lived in?”
“No it was completely flattened.”
“Well I’m sorry, but we just can’t help you.”
“Fine. I really hope a giant lizard steps on you one day.”
I wrote a flash fiction two days ago which I think some people have missed. Take a look at it here: The Graveyard Shift
I’ve actually damaged my lower back quite badly, so I’m going to spread out the rest of the 13 Horror Films posts. I won’t be finishing them on Halloween anymore, as I need to take care of myself.
Nancy enjoyed doing the graveyard shift at the local radio station. It meant she could avoid most of the people that worked there and she could play whatever she wanted. Being a night owl had its advantages.
“Hi this is Graveyard Nancy. I hope you’ve been having a great evening so far. Whoever is still awake send me a message. Let me know your thoughts. Tonight we’re going old school starting with some Led Zeppelin. Here’s When the Levee Breaks.” she said into the microphone. She pressed the key and the music began playing. A short time later messages began appearing on the computer screen in front of her. She scanned them. So far they were just the usual types of comments people sent. Then one caught her attention:
You've got such a nice voice.
I would like to meet you.
Nancy looked at it. There was always at least one of these ones. She was still musing about what to do with it when a new song began playing. Another message appeared:
I'm right outside.
Please let me in.
She got up from her seat and looked out the window to the street below. There may have been a shadowy figure by the door…
Let me in
Or I'll find my own way in
Her heart began racing. She thought she could hear someone below trying to force the door open.
“That was Evidence by Faith No More. And now here’s Joy Division with Atmosphere.” Nancy said. She stood up and opened the studio door. She crept down the hallway until she got to the stairs. She listened intently and then slowly went down them…
A few minutes later she returned to the studio. She sat down again and wiped the blood off her mouth. She liked it when the meals came right to the door.
“That was Iggy Pop with The Passenger. And now here’s Nirvana with Come As You Are. And keep those messages coming!” Maybe another one would come tonight. Her voice always brought them here.